Heather Bleasdell

I'm Back!....and he's here!

Yes, I'm here again. I've been in another world, a world of waiting. Waiting for the 4th anniversary of my dad's death to be over and waiting for the birth of my dear little nephew. I'm happy to report, all is well. The anniversary passed Nov. 11th and Rhett Sullivan Maderis was born November 15 @ 10:19 AM. Death and rebirth. Who doesn't love the month of Scorpio! My sister was a warrior - not a fighter mind you, but a focused straight-shootin' mama with a job to do. As her midwife said, "I wasn't worried about her. SHE knows how to do this" and she does. I admire her so much. It was her thrid in-home birth and she was awesome. She is also happy to be done. For her, the family she imagined for herself is complete. We often focus on what is not happening in our lives, so it's important to remember to savor the successes we experience as well. She just had a major one. I'll post a baby pic in the future. For now, I'll share with you my daughter Addie and niece Carmen making a birthday cake for baby Rhett. He's a yummy one.

+ Unicorns Never Lie

Steve and I threw a Halloween rager. Costumes, Keg and DJ = too much fun! We are still savoring (and cleaning up) the experience a week later. And I'm catching up. 

I'm not going to lie to you. I feel too busy. I haven't been here (blog) in a week. I have too much on my plate. Something is going to have to go, but what? I think it's something about me. Some belief I have about "working". I'm not sure what it is, but the New Moon in Scorpio is tomorrow and I am going to let that shit GO.

That being said, somehow, by the grace of the Goddess, I am still managing to meet my commitments. Hope I can keep it up a little longer, or let it go. Check out my Love a Nut post on Build Altars when you get a chance.

Jack Johnson at the Greek Theater in Berkeley

This was SO not something I would do and I am SO glad I did it.

To be fair, my husband and I were home-bodies way before we had our daughter... so I can't blame parenthood for our lack of noctural exploration. However, the responsibilites of parenthood make it a little more challenging for the naturally Home-bound folks to bust forth into the big world, much less drive 45 minutes to the BIG BOLD CITY that is Berkeley... please. Lucky for us, our wonderful new Petaluma friends don't know about our stagnant tendencies and invited us to a concert. 

I won't lie to you. We are not huge JJ fans and we fear crowds, traffic, parking, concert food and over-spending. And we still said yes. Yes to adventure, yes to new friends, yes to stirring the pot, yes to the Mystery... that it might work out BETTER than we can imagine. And you know what, it did. We carpooled with our friends and laughed all the way to Berkeley. We found great parking and great seats. We ran into dear old friends and made a new one - love Nita! And, to top it off... Jack Johnson & his friends were terrific. I don't know what to say about him, other than he feels good - good in the heart and very inspiring in his relaxed performance. He is comfortable being himself. It felt like a gift to witness and share in the experience of artists channeling creative energy full-out. It was just good. And, we really like Mr Johnson now. Not just because of his performance but because of his authenticity, heart and caring. If you don't know, Jack Johnson donates 100% of his profits from this tour (and his 2008 tour) to charity. Aloha Spirit is alive. I can taste the rainbow, can you?

i heart ballet

Having a daughter is heavenly. I think the image speaks for itself. We've been spending a lot of time together lately, and there have been moments when I can't believe my luck - she is so beautiful and fun - and moments when I can't believe I'm being yelled at by a 2.5 year old caveman. It's a little crazy, but that's mommyhood for you. It's a dance, not always graceful, but moving with a beauty and force that is hard to deny. 

Last week she had 2 full days of school and loved it. This week, she will be doing her 2 full days and I will love it - no more worrying for me. I'm deep in the expansion of Build Altars and this week we will be hosting our first guest blogger on the New Moon in Libra, this Thursday. Hope you can check it out.

Books: check out the children's book Me Hungry by Jeremy Tankard to delight your cave-child, and if you need a little help relating with your cave-kid, check out The Happiest Toddler on the Block by Harvey Karp, MD.

First Sculpture Painting

Picked up the monkey from school and said, where do you want to go? The Craft Store. So we headed to Michaels. She picked out an ice cream cone to paint. I loved the gasp of delight when she touched her painted brush to the sculpture. Pure rapture.

September in Lake Tahoe

Addie and I just spent a long weekend with Nana in Tahoe. Mid-September is quiet and gorgeous. We rested, went out to dinner, took walks and visited our favorite playgrounds. I also did a wonderful trail run on the Tahoe Rim Trail AND watched several episodes of Project Runway - I love competitive sewing. We don't have cable TV at home in Petaluma, so it's always a special treat for me when we visit my mom. That, and eating sugar cereal. Oh the memories of spending every summer and weekend in Tahoe. It's wonderful to be creating special memories with my daughter, and new ones with my mom. You can read more about my mom and sewing here.

+ september schedule

Just turned the calendar to September... looks like I am all booked up! Thanks Addie Rose.

Artist & Mother

I loved this graphic story about motherhood by Vivien McDermid

 

The Perks

Today is my work-day = a 3 hour long period during the morning, twice a week. This is the time that I have set aside to do my work. Sometimes I do intuitive sessions, sometimes errands, sometimes clean and organize but mainly I sit on the computer and wonder where the time goes. I usually have to make phone calls about things I don't want to deal with, so I always push those off until my next work day, which is tomorrow morning. (And I don't make the calls then either!) That's right 2 mornings a week, I get to work. And sadly, I miss my daughter... who I spend all my other time with. 

Yesterday my babysitter came over after school to play with addie. They love each other, equally and independently. If I come anywhere near them, addie says NO MOMMY and pushes me away. So, I went to the Movies. As I was riding my bike downtown, I thought "this is how I get paid." Often, and I am sure I have written about this before, I feel underwhelmed by how little mothers are valued and how we are not financially compensated. Sure, if we are lucky enough to have a partner who can "support the operation" we are supposed to feel grateful (and we do feel grateful), but most families I know are struggling on one income and the mommas have guilt that they are not "contributing" to the financial success of their families. It's intense. This might also be considered a luxury problem as my friend would say - because we have the luxury to stay home and raise our own children - but I think that is sad. I think it should be a right. But unfortunately, that is not the current fashion. So, for my own sanity, I started to think of more ways I "get paid" that are not financial and are not obvious. NOTE: Some of these things were hard one, for it took me a long time to get settled and find babysitters and routines that work for both addie and I.

THE PERKS 
I get to...

• spend time at home
• make my own schedule
• go to the movies on a week day
• walk outside every day
• take addie and i to the gym (addie loves the kids club)
• hangout with my local friends and their kids
• learn how to cook
• go on mid-week adventures (this one I am just starting to cultivate :)

Thats enough for now. I don't want to get all PollyAnna on you.