Today is my work-day = a 3 hour long period during the morning, twice a week. This is the time that I have set aside to do my work. Sometimes I do intuitive sessions, sometimes errands, sometimes clean and organize but mainly I sit on the computer and wonder where the time goes. I usually have to make phone calls about things I don't want to deal with, so I always push those off until my next work day, which is tomorrow morning. (And I don't make the calls then either!) That's right 2 mornings a week, I get to work. And sadly, I miss my daughter... who I spend all my other time with.
Yesterday my babysitter came over after school to play with addie. They love each other, equally and independently. If I come anywhere near them, addie says NO MOMMY and pushes me away. So, I went to the Movies. As I was riding my bike downtown, I thought "this is how I get paid." Often, and I am sure I have written about this before, I feel underwhelmed by how little mothers are valued and how we are not financially compensated. Sure, if we are lucky enough to have a partner who can "support the operation" we are supposed to feel grateful (and we do feel grateful), but most families I know are struggling on one income and the mommas have guilt that they are not "contributing" to the financial success of their families. It's intense. This might also be considered a luxury problem as my friend would say - because we have the luxury to stay home and raise our own children - but I think that is sad. I think it should be a right. But unfortunately, that is not the current fashion. So, for my own sanity, I started to think of more ways I "get paid" that are not financial and are not obvious. NOTE: Some of these things were hard one, for it took me a long time to get settled and find babysitters and routines that work for both addie and I.
THE PERKS
I get to...
- spend time at home
- make my own schedule
- go to the movies on a week day
- walk outside every day
- take addie and i to the gym (addie loves the kids club)
- hangout with my local friends and their kids
- learn how to cook
- go on mid-week adventures (this one I am just starting to cultivate :)
Thats enough for now. I don't want to get all PollyAnna on you.